Category Archives: Relationships

Mother Started the Whole Thing…

Devin-McCourty_Fit_Fathers-1-768x512Believe it! Yes, Mother’s Day was the inspiration for Father’s Day.  There are two stories that speak to the initial celebration of Father’s Day.  I am going to focus on a women by the name of Sonora Dodd who came up with the idea of honoring and celebrating her father while listening to a Mother’s Day serum at church in 1909 in the state of Washington.  In 1966 President Lyndon B. Johnson through an executive order designated the 3rd Sunday in June as the day to celebrated Fathers.  However, it was not until 1972, 58 years after President Woodrow Wilson made Mother’s Day official, that honoring Fathers became a nationwide holiday in the United States.fathers-rights-in-the-czech-republic

It doesn’t matter when you celebrate Father’s; whatever the day might be, make sure you let your father know how much you appreciate the things that he does and continues to do you. Write him a personalized card expressing some of the things you love and admire about him, things that you find yourself doing that he does.  This will warm his heart tremendously; just knowing that he’s making an impact on your growth and development and overall life in many cases

Soon after Father’s Day was celebrated in the United States many other countries decided to follow suit.  Many replicated the United States while others decide to celebrated Fathers on a different day and some in a different month.5b8609c755736d965c6656914d861aa7

▪ New Moon of September– Nepal
▪ First Sunday in October– Luxembourg
▪ Second Sunday in November– Estonia, Finland, Norway, Sweden
▪ December 5– Thailand
▪ March 14– Iran
▪ March 19– Bolivia, Honduras, Italy, Lichtenstein, Portugal, Spain
▪ May 8– South Korea
▪ First Sunday in June– Lithuania
▪ Second Sunday in June– Austria, Ecuador, Belgium
▪ Third Sunday in June– Antigua, Bahamas, Bangladesh, Bulgaria, Canada, Chile, Columbia, Costa Rica, Cuba, Cyprus, Czech Republic, France, Greece, Guyana, Hong Kong, India, Ireland, Jamaica, Japan, Malaysia, Malta, Mauritius, Mexico, Netherlands, Pakistan, Panama, Paraguay, Peru, Philippines, Puerto Rico, Saint Vincent, Singapore, Slovakia, South Africa, Sri Lanka, Switzerland, Trinidad, Turkey, United Kingdom, Venezuela, Zimbabwe
▪ June 17– El Salvador, Guatemala
▪ June 23– Nicaragua, Poland, Uganda
▪ Second Sunday in July– Uruguay
▪ Last Sunday in July– Dominican Republic
▪ Second Sunday in August– Brazil
▪ August 8– Taiwan, China
▪ August 24– Argentina
▪ First Sunday in September– Australia, New Zealand

Father-and-daughter-looking-at-tablet-e1462890915500Father you are SPECIAL, you are LOVED more than you’ll ever know, you are held in high regard.  Your very PRESENCE warms my heart.  I know you don’t think I consider you to be an ICON, but you are, you are larger than life to me!  latino

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY TO ALL FATHERS…

Luv Ya…Chris

Love, The Tie That Binds…

d3481af8c251672348e367915ac7d0e4

The love that a son has for his father is truly special and the same is true of the love that a father has  for his son…The tie that binds.  Sons look to their father’s for guidance and training as they develop and mature into young men.  To give you an example, last week I was channel surfacing and I stopped at one of the Reality Shows, “Love and Hip Hop”. The scene was Stevie J conversing with is son who was feeling some kind of way about the lack of presence his dad had in his life when he was growing up.  Although he now understands that his father’s occupation supported him and his sisters and as a result he was on the road quite often.  Now with that said Stevie’s son shared with him that he was challenged with learning how to do many things on his own, for example, learning to shave and other things a young man looks to his dad  for guidance in.

I have very dear friend who has a tween that has never had a relationship with his dad.  His mother has struggled over the years to fill the void but you and I both know that’s not entirely possible, given the needs of a young man who longs for his father.  Now fast forward to today this young man, a tween, is still searching for answers and continues to look to his mother to provide him with answers to his questions,”Why doesn’t my dad want to see me”.  “why doesn’t he love me”?  This young man has an overwhelming void in his life.   A void that might possibly require clinical support so this young man doesn’t travel a path that leads to self destruction.  Listening to my friend share this with me was heart wrenching and all I could say to myself was “Fathers please do not neglect your sons, they are crying out for you LOVE“.

ONE DAY YOU’RE GOING TO WAKE UP AND NOTICE THAT YOU SHOULD’VE TRIED…I WAS WORTH THE FIGHT…YOUR FORGOTTEN SON…

“Happy Father’s Day” 

Always…Chris

Link

S.M.A.R.T…Love

SMART Love…I have often wondered, if two people take the time to ask themselves some specific questistandbehindyou_posterimg copyions about the person they are interested in building a relationship with, would the answers make them think twice about pursuing something on a higher level  with that individual. I would like to share an acronym that I created as a guide to help men and women understand if the person they are interacting with is truly someone they  can spend the rest of their life with; I mean really stay together until one or the other ceases to exist.

Sensible, is the person reasonable, do they use good judgement when making  decisions.

Marginalize, does he or she make you feel important?  Are your suggestions and ideas respected as credible? 

Amicable, is he or she non-confrontational? Do they project a harmonious vibe?

Realistic, does he or she make decisions based on the way things are, and not the way they want things to be?  Are they somewhat practical?

Trustworthy, would you trust this person with your life?

No, you are not looking for a business partner, but you are trying to get a sense of whether this person is someone that you can communicate with, someone that will be a good listener, someone that has your back, someone that has the same or similar values as you, someone that you are comfortable with.  I could go on and on but I won’t. I am simply positioning you for a look ahead. No one is perfect but why not invest some time in understanding the theme of the “picture” while you  admire the “frame”

I am living and loving life…Chris

Cubic Zirconia, Real or Fake…Diamond

IMG_3711

I asked a friend while at a lunch why do men hold a Diamond in their hand and let it go for a Cubic Zirconia, he replied because sometimes they can’t tell the difference between the two! Wow! That answer blew my mind and ignited a curiosity in me about the two gems and their unique forms.  I did some deeper research on Diamonds verses Cubic Zirconia and found some interesting facts. This lead me to compare the simulation of Diamonds to woman of character and Cubic Zirconia to females with the lack of…Oooooooh spill the wine darlin, lets have a conversation, shall we?

After each fact about the two stones I will give my interpretation of the facts as they may relate to relationships.

Here are some facts about Diamonds versus Cubic Zirconia

images
1. The primary difference, Diamonds are naturally mined gems CZs are synthetically manufactured.
2. The largest supply of CZs are manufactured China, Diamonds can be found in some of the come unique places around the world.
3. The Wealthy  find it safer to wear CZs  than the real Diamond.
4. Diamonds lose value when purchased but are valuable alone!
5. Diamonds have meaning and power.
7. CZs are affordable, diamonds are expensive.
8. A gemologist needs special equipment to tell the two part! Ummmmmm
sounds like a job for the Omniscient Heavenly Father! He see’s the real deal and
deals in truth.
9.  It takes another Diamond to cut a Diamond! Amazing
10. Diamonds are formed in rough dark places cubics are made in a factory.

The price paid for a fake doesn’t alter its  value…

These are a few but very important facts about these two gems! Yet one is Fake and the other is Real.

Fact 1.  Diamonds are naturally made, CZs are synthetically manufactured. When choosing a mate it’s important that they possess character, integrity, morals, and good values, self confidence, spiritual convictions, and many other characteristics that make for good a person. This means the person has gone through some things in life and has applied lessons learned to build character worth living with forever, and being an example for others . That’s a true Diamond. One without character just mimics the character of another but has no depth and most likely never practice what they preach! CZ!!!!

Fact 2.  CZs are manufactureed in China! Hello can we say copies! Diamonds can be found  in unique places around the world. A person of character allows different facets of life their to create character and true moral depth. They recognize and embrace their true purpose and live in their truth. It’s sad to say but some people never develop any true character and will leave nothing impressionable in this life. A special friend once said to me, “some people will live and leave earth with a certificate of attendance.” Ha now ain’t that a word”. They showed up and never learned a thing! But once again they mimic the life of another! You never get to know the real person and most times they covet and maligne others to make themselves feel and appear important. Their validation comes from external means and their extrinsic values are based on things. How can one build with someone if they never know who you are. Lack of self worth and insecurity is a sad combination.

Fact 3. The Wealthy find it safer to wear CZs  than the real diamond; now here is where I have some food for thought. I’m not a big fan of social media but do you ever wonder why people tend to post a lot about their relationships or personal lives wearing the face of greatness; yet if you had the chance to see them behind closed doors the face of their union is ugly and cold! I say this to say when you have the real thing you don’t have to convince anyone or impress them because you are  secure within yourself. When you are confident you don’t have to convince anyone of anything.

Fact 4. Diamonds lose value when purchased but are valuable alone!
The good book says he that finds a wife finds a good thing (Proverbs 18:22) also that a married woman’s interest is divided God /husband but unmarried she has time for the Lord . Let’s not interpret this to mean she looses her essence and value by any means . However let’s look at the fact she is valuable and validated alone. When married she is serving multiple purposes.

Fact 5. Diamonds have meaning and power and to possess them means you must have experience and wisdom, knowledge and understanding which gives you power! It’s meaningless to know something and yet you don’t put it into practice or even have the know how to carry it out. In your union with the right person you walk in understanding of each other with the power to sustain a healthy relationship. Diamonds have been put through the fire! The hotter the fire the more their brilliance is undeniable .

How then does one settle for something Fake? It’s also important to remember that a real Diamond can have inclusions or imperfections, their true essence is they are a Diamond! Your mate isn’t perfect but your  love should be! Perfect love casts out fear. There is no fear in love! Love must be unconditional, sacrificial, patience, endurable, otherwise it’s not love.  Now that’s powerful!

Fact 6. CZs carry more weight equivalent to the size of a Diamond, (sounds more like baggage). Now this may have an ambiguous connotation to it . On one hand the ability of a diamond to shine or a person to possess character and strength is contingent upon their ability to withstand pressure and still stand strong. It’s another when they break under pressure, ahhhhhh Fake Diamond! CZ-bad unions break up under pressure. In order to shine you have to be willing to have staying power through the good and the bad times. It’s work y’all! But it’s impossible if it ain’t the right fit!!!!  Another out look …We all have issues and imperfections but when they become too weighted it’s extra baggage. It’s soooooooo critical not to bring extra baggage into a new relationship and occasionally the more mature ones need periodic cleaning. Do not ever allow your past baggage to interfere with your present. Clean up!

Fact 7. CZs are affordable, Diamonds are expensive. Sometimes in life people desire the real things but do not want to pay for the value! At times they either rise to the occasion and save to afford the real deal, get in debt to own it or wait for a sale. One may desire a real Diamond but because they cannot afford it they settle for what appears to be real when deep down they know it’s not.images

When you find a mate worth having you will do your due diligence to put in the work; it takes time to not only capture that person but you will be consistent in your love and actions inorder to maintain it. Whatever you did to afford that person you must be willing to continue the behavior. One should never have to adjust themselves for acceptance but adjust to coexist . You should be celebrated not tolerated. If it’s worth fighting for then don’t give up! No one said it will be easy but if it’s worth it, it takes two to fight for it. One man’s trash is another’s treasure. Mates should never take each other’s value for granted and should continue to work to afford their most precious investment …Each other!

Continue reading

Gallery

Bury IT!

This gallery contains 3 photos.

Hello ladies I know it’s been a while since I’ve graced pen to paper ! As life has its seasons so does life’s responsibilities . I’ve been quite busy nursing my baby RS Salon, she is growing constantly and beautifully! … Continue reading

I Loved You When…

Happy-valentines-day-5

I loved you when I fell in love with you, I loved you when you asked me to be your wife, I loved you when I had our first baby, I loved you when you lost your job, I loved you when you decided to start your own business, I loved you when the business failed and we lost everything, I loved you when you pawned our rings to put food on the table, I loved you when the opportunity of your dreams came knocking, I loved you when you said that diamond is too small, it doesn’t represent the depth of my love for you, I loved you when the door opened and you presented our family with the house we thought we’d never have,  I loved you when I walked in the room, found you on your knees thanking GOD for revealing purpose in your life, I loved you when you shared your journal with me, “My Daily Conversation With GOD”…

Valentines Day…A day that is suppose to represent love…Real love needs no representation because what you do and how you treat the people in your life should say “I Love You”.  Least we remember : “If Love were just an emotion, then God couldn’t command it.  But Love is something you do, Love is an action, it can produce emotion.  The Bible says,”Let’s not merely say that we Love each other; let us show the truth by our actions” ( 1 John 3:18 NLT).love01[1]
I am with you because I love you… You continuously  show me love in so many ways, the post- it on the mirror that reads “Have a pleasant Day”, the laundry, washed and folded, the surprise meal you prepared and served, the clean car I drive, the smile on your face when you see me, the warmth of your touch when we lay together, your loving embrace when I am sad,  your tender kiss on my cheek…I Loved you when I fell in Love with you…love01[1]

Living Love (life) In Reverse – PART 2

Looking Back

What’s Persevering you? 

As I looked back over the story of Lot and his wife there were so many lessons in that one passage that I had to share this conversation in two parts. The question “what’s preserving you” resonated with me as I began consider the events of that very moment when Lot’s wife looked back, consequently to Lot moving on! Stay with me I’m going deeper. The bible says how can two walk together if they cannot agree? (Amos 3:3).  Lot and his wife started off in the same direction, however it seems that trip came to an end. This influenced me to consider the fact that two people can start off in the same direction yet something aborts the rest of the trip. Two people come together, everything seems beautiful then boom something changes… Life happens! As Lot’s wife looked back I equated it to the emotional state of a woman not being able to let go of what was, how they got together all the memories good and bad. Meanwhile at the ranch, as she becomes stuck in her emotional and spiritual attachment to the relationship the man has moved on! News flash, men will! “Oh goodness we see where you are going with this”! Put your seat belts on ladies, you might feel a little turbulence on this ride.

Not to pass judgment as I’m one who despises judgmental behavior. Hopefully this discussion can provoke some self evaluation and healing. The big elephant in the room is living love in reverse,” what’s preserving you in love”? Has it been difficult for you to move on without the person that you began the journey with?  I know some people, places or things may be harder to shake than others. Because we are emotional creatures, it is so important for us to guard our hearts and find out if the person you are beginning your journey with is there for a season or long term. Lot and his wife began together but they didn’t finish together. We can relate this to, two individuals who have different goals in life. Being unequally yoked spiritually, mentally, physically, financially only leads to a seasonal union. If you are stuck in a memory rut of what once was, you must find the solution to moving forward. Especially when the other party has moved on and left you behind emotionally and physically.  If it’s the end of that chapter of your relationship pray first and foremost and allow God to help you move forward. “Apart from him we can do nothing”(John 15:5). One will never survive in a one sided union. Some relationships will write the entire chapters of your life and some a single page!
Continue reading