I’ve changed….into my Mother!

Stop laughing.  Live long enough, and you’ll know exactly what I’m saying.  The process is gradual; it sneaks up on you before you realize what’s happening….gradual change!  The worse kind of change is the gradual kind.  Sort of like putting on those extra 20 pounds that you didn’t realize you had until one day your favorite suit is a tad too snug!  LOL

But I digress!  I realized there was a possibility that I may be turning into my mother the first time I used the term, “because I said so”.  My son was quick to tell me that this was not a reason why he couldn’t do something.  Well, that led to the next infamous line, “I brought you into this world; I’ll take you out”.

After I closed my mouth from the enormous GASP I let out with the thought that I used words I swore I’d never say in life, I paused! Then I just cracked up laughing. Hehehehehe….I was becoming my mother.  As unexpected as the change, so was the pooch that developed around my midsection.  I remember giggling my mother’s and asking her where that came from.  She gave me the “stupid” look and said “you just wait”.  Wait no more; my time has arrived!  I even took a picture of mine to confirm what I suspected was in fact, the additional “person” I was now carrying around with me!  Oh and by the way, be sure and delete those photos off your phone!  Embarrassing moment let me just say!

The ultimate clue that I was changing into my mother shocked me at first.  Don’t get me wrong; I love my Mom more than breathing!  She’s been with OUR FATHER for almost 11 years and not a day goes by that I don’t think of her and wish she was “physically” still here.  But don’t worry about me; SHE IS STILL HERE!

How you ask? Well the ultimate sign that I’ve changed into my Mother revealed its self early one morning as I groggily got ready for work.  I woke up late and was rushing.  As I breezed past the mirror I was startled.  I stopped and slowly stepped backward to glance again into the mirror.  And there she was!  As I looked at my face and my features, I saw it clear as day.  I had become my Mom – the graying hair, the pooch, the sagging skin right under my chin, even the moles that have shown up on my face.

Yep!  Mattie is alive and well right here with me each and every day.  Not only have I changed and now use many of her sayings from the past.  I also thankfully have adopted her outlook on life.  The worry and concern that I have carried around for decades has progressed into “don’t sweat it” and “that concerns me why”.  I now understand how she still smiled and laughed in the latter years, when the mere thought of dealing with all she dealt with would have previously brought me to tears.

So as I gracefully embrace this latest change, I give thanks to an astonishing, brave, and loving woman who showed me through her actions (and sometimes words), that even when life changes aren’t ideal, time is precious and life is too short to get caught up in crap! Live, laugh, and love!  That’s a change I’m looking forward to exploring for many, many decades to come!

Smooches, Brenda

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